It goes without saying, the weather in London is about as unpredictable as a cornered Squirell. Given this lottery of weather conditions throughout the day, the only option is to wear layers and always carry an umbrella – yes, even in mid August. However, this somewhat hedged approach to keeping warm/cool/dry has a massive downfall for me in that every day, no matter what combination I am wearing, I will inevitably find myself sweating as soon as I begin my underground commute on the sauna line. Unless I “luck out” by finding space near the Beaufort Scale 7 breeze blasting through the front of the carriage I will have disco pits in under 10 minutes – not a great look when you’re presenting your disappointing quarterly reports to the directors. To prevent further embarrassment, I decided something has to be done about this and a few weeks ago began furiously Googling.
Type in “prevent sweating” into the search giant and as you might suspect, you are presented with the usual mix of miracle ebooks, several forums which end in name calling, the dodgy online doctor website and as always the very brief and often useless ehow.com article. After closing the 95% of useless tabs you hastily opened, you will eventually get to the facts and hopefully come to a decent conclusion. Here’s what I came up with.
Excessive sweating is scientifically known as hyperhidrosis. I wouldn’t say I have hyperhidrosis, but it seems online, you either don’t sweat or you have hyperhidrosis, so for the purpose of my research it seems this was the best term to go for. You can also Google this for yourself now as I don’t want to go into the possible causes of excessive sweating – I’m sure like me you only care about the solution.
Logically the first thing to try is prevention rather than cure. I came across this website, and it had these 11 suggestions. Naturally, using my manly wisdom, I have arrogantly dismissed them all.
1) Bathe daily – a good shower is best. – Who doesn’t shower every day?
2) Wash with a good deodorizing or antibacterial soap. – Shower Gel – Done.
3) Wear clean undergarments. - Shit, I thought 5 day old pants would stop me from sweating.
4) Keep underarms shaved if profuse sweating there is an issue. - The hair encourages smelly pits but doesn’t increase sweat production.
5) Use a natural deodorant daily. - Natural? I don’t believe in magic.
6) Strive to stay stress free during the day or as much as possible. - Really? Do you live on this planet?
7) Carry a handkerchief around and use it, swiping your forehead, for example, to blot sweat. - No thanks.
8) Drink plenty of water and keep some on hand in a handy water bottle and in a cooler. - Yeh, yeh 8 glasses a day, we know.
9) Get on a weight loss program with the approval of your doctor. - Effort, and I’m thin.
10) Avoid spicy foods – Real men eat Vindaloo - FACT
11) Kick the bad habits: smoking, drinking, over eating, excessive caffeine. - So basically no fun… not for me thanks.
OK, so not all my arguments are compelling, but to be honest all that sounds like way to much effort. I’m going to need a much easier faster solution in which I don’t have to change every aspect of my life.
The first reasonably solution that suited me and my lifestyle was actually mentioned in passing conversation by one of my female friends a few months ago. She actually had a similar problem and swore by this stuff. Mitchum is a heavy duty antiperspirant available in most supermarkets and chemists. It boasts to be as effective as prescription antiperspirant and uses 25% solution of aluminium sesquichlorohydrate (something else for you to Google if you want). Already this sounds like my kind of product – some catchy named active ingredient in the highest concentration allowed over the counter. Many people on the internet will rave about this stuff and other people will tell you how it does nothing. I’m firmly in the “does nothing” camp. I think it might have been actually less effective than the Nivea Silver Protect I use. Additionally the white marks and all that flaky white residue that build up under your arm was the worst I have used. By all means give this a go, it might work for you, personally I wouldn’t waste your money or endure the few embarrassing tube rides.
The next and last product I came across was Driclor. This stuff is the nuts! Simple concept, put it on last thing at night, wash it off in the morning repeat ever few days. It works by actually blocky your sweat glands so that sweat cannot escape: like I said – Simple. Ok, so everyone will tell you it itches, some people even go as far as saying it was unbearable. For me, it was slightly itchy but seeing as you apply just before you sleep, you only have to put up with it for a short period and then your asleep. If you think it’s unbearable you need to man up. For the slight discomfort, this product is worth it - immediately you will see the results. The next day I did not sweat. The following day, still no sweat. The next day, again no sweaty arm pits. It was quite unbelievable how effective Driclor worked and how quickly I saw results. It’s a bit of an odd sensation when you go to the gym and your armpits don’t sweat, and I also feel that other areas sweat a little more when I work out. Obviously, this is a minor downside to a great product.
For someone who is busy, impatient and sweats a little bit more than they would like to, Driclor is definitely the Product you should try out first. Forget natural remedies, lifestyle changes or regular antiperspirant, this stuff will keep you dry and your shirt fresh and crisp, assuming you know how to iron.
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